I recently wrote a poem for my sister’s wedding entitled, “Love Goes Through the Stomach”. What is not included in the poem text is that I actually gave a speech and a reading at the wedding rehearsal dinner. Afterwards, I got a lot of comments about how much it helped to have the background on the poem before I read it. So, I decided to publish the speech I gave here, along with my explanation I gave on DeviantArt, to offer that same helpful background to you. Enjoy!
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- DeviantArt background on this poem:
I wrote some background on this poem on DeviantArt, so I thought I would share it here. You can also see the actual post at http://xrose89.deviantart.com/art/Love-Goes-Through-the-Stomach-626430058.
“This is the poem I wrote for Julia and Frank’s, my sister and my brother-in-law’s, wedding. They were happily married July 2nd and I’m proud to say I was able to stand up in their wedding and be there for both of them. I have a new Bro-in-law! Welcome to the family, Frank!
After much contemplation, inspiration finally came to me at about 3 in the morning on the night before the wedding rehearsal. 😉
I realized I couldn’t capture every moment of their whole relationship into one poem, so I chose a moment I thought embodied them: the first time they said ‘I love you’. The title of the poem comes from an old family adage about how the best kind of love, the lasting kind, is formed and shared over making and eating food together. Also, sonnets are traditionally the form of classic love poetry (like Shakespeare), so it seemed right to craft it in sonnet-form.
I also wrote a speech to go with the poem, so if you’re interested in more of my background and process, I’ll paste that below.
All in all, it ended up being a feel-good poem that was personal for them and embodied what defined a lasting marriage.
Mission accomplished.
Enjoy :D”
2. The speech I gave at my sister’s wedding rehearsal dinner:
To read at rehearsal dinner for Julia and Frank:
Dear family and friends,
It is my distinguished honor to stand here today to celebrate with you the marriage of Frank and Julia. For those of you who don’t know me yet, you probably will soon, since I’m Julia’s older sister and we went to different schools together (laughs here; this is an old family joke).
I’m a writer, specifically a journalist, and I currently work at the copydesk at The Oakland Press, Oakland County’s newspaper. I also dabble in creative writing, specifically poetry and short fiction. In fact, that is how I got my start in journalism, and it’s a hobby I still enjoy today.
Because of this, Julia and Frank both specifically requested that I write a poem for them regarding their relationship and their marriage, which we are celebrating today, and read it to you all at this time.
As I began thinking about the poem, I thought of Shakepeare’s great love sonnets, poems like sonnet 18, which states:
“Shall I compare thee to a summer’s day?
Thou are more lovely and more temperate.”
These sonnets are among the greatest love poems ever written, and I wanted Frank and Julia’s love to shine through the poem in the same way.
So, I did what any good journalist would do and interviewed them, asking them questions about their relationship.
“Is this for you or for an article you’re writing?” Julia asked.
“It’s for me,” I said, explaining that I needed details to write the poem.
“Frank is more poetic,” Julia said. And, he was.
Afterwards, I thought about marriage was, and I settled on this: it’s lifetime grown out of a small spark of the words, “I love you.” And, love just happens, unexpectedly, and the next thing you know you’re planning a wedding. It’s all part of the love story, grown out of three very simple words.
I actually found another poem, which expresses this (and inspired my own), called “Marriage” by Lawrence Raab, which is as follows:
Marriage
by Lawrence Raab
Years later they find themselves talking
about chances, moments when their lives
might have swerved off
for the smallest reason.
What if
I hadn’t phoned, he says, that morning?
What if you’d been out,
as you were when I tried three times
the night before?
Then she tells him a secret.
She’d been there all evening, and she knew
he was the one calling, which was why
she hadn’t answered.
Because she felt—
because she was certain—her life would change
if she picked up the phone, said hello,
said, I was just thinking
of you.
I was afraid,
she tells him. And in the morning
I also knew it was you, but I just
answered the phone
the way anyone
answers a phone when it starts to ring,
not thinking you have a choice.
Indeed, while it may not be the same story, many times I feel like Frank and Julia’s love has been like this. Years later, they will find themselves talking about all the good moments, all the good memories that brought them together.
In fact, when I asked what moment stood out to them in their relationship, Julia replied with “I don’t know! There are tons of moments like that! That’s why I’m marrying him.”
But, upon further discussion, both Frank and Julia replied with the same defining moment in their relationship: the first time they said “I love you” to each other. And, as I mulled over, I began to see how it, indeed, symbolized, not only their relationship, but their marriage as well.
Here’s how they both described it:
- Julia said, “We were baking cookies, he was sitting on the countertop and he came over and told me that he loved me.”
- And, Frank said, “Well, she was sticking her hands in the cookie dough, which I think is disgusting, and mixing around the cookie dough and then putting little balls of stuff onto the tray. And, I was just kind of watching her, and I just told her. I said, “I love you,” stared right into her eyes. She said it back – surprisingly. Not much more to it, more romantic than it sounds. But, you can add a few words in here and there, jazz it up.”
We have a saying in our family, passed down from my great-grandmother, Theresa Armbruster, which states, as she would say, “love goes through the stomach”.
It means that love, at least the good and lasting kind, is best given, developed and received over making food and eating it together. It, as she would say, is a solid basis for a good marriage. Food is like love, and you can never have enough of it.
Ironic that we are all sitting here over a meal tonight! I guess we all must really love each other.
It is on this that I based my poem, and I think it is also this that embodies Julia and Frank and their love for one another. And so, without further ado, I give you the sonnet I wrote for tonight. It is entitled, “Love Goes through the Stomach.”
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To read the poem, visit: https://thewriteaholic.com/2016/07/01/love-goes-through-the-stomach/
The Rose 